Every time I Cry, I Grow a Little Stronger...

SubhannAllah (Glory be to God). Rainy season continues to pour down and occasionally my umbrella brakes and I become soaked up in the seemingly deep stresses of life that just consume all your energy and joy. Then I realise it was just a little shower and will pass so I’m pressing on awaiting that sunshine which I feel is closer than ever.

Alright, enough of the metaphors! This is not Dawson’s Creek diaries!! This blog has become a bit of a therapy session for me as I feel as though I’m talking to God as I write while also maybe even helping a couple of you through sharing my experiences.
I have been a lil stressed recently as you do. My new schedule is very time and energy consuming. I literally do not have a day of rest and that is draining at times. And as is perhaps accepted as natural now days, living at home with parents when your stressed with work n studies is not easy. Today during an immanent torrential downpour my mum said ‘you used to be your dads favourite’ and while I knew that I wasn’t at the moment it was so hard hearing that from her.

Life is difficult, we all have struggles and we all have issues. Collectively. And it is so easy to become so indulged in your own problems that you forget that those closest to you, i.e your parents have issues too. So when they nag about housework n making stew you can’t quite comprehend how they don’t realise that you have been at work all day or that you have class in the morning and need to prepare. But what we forget I think, is that their struggles, now, before and in the future tend to be so much deeper than us being momentarily broke, failing an exam or not wanting to wash the dishes.

What I have learnt this past few rainy months is that a parents love and pleasure towards their child is so important. I have been walking round my house like I’m some big woman who has her own stuff to do and no time for chit chat and they have picked up on it. And while efforts to ‘stay out of his/her way’ may seem the best way to avoid the obvious argument, it cripples the relationship between the two people you should honour most in this world. And its crazy because you may not think they notice but they do. My mum said she missed talking to me (not in so many words but that was the gist). That’s rather sad!

My dad told me he loved me this morning (during that immenent storm) and while I knew that, the reminder lifted such a heavy weight from me as I had been so consumed in my own issues that I had magnified them beyond what they really were. Those words were enough, in some ways. And my mum, though I think if she read my blog would realise that I do know this, told me to man up basically. She said life is not easy and you can’t trip over every hurdle (basically) and so I should try and be stronger through some of these hard times because there may be harder times to come.

There is so much truth in that. And while its so easy for me to say these things I do realise its so hard in action but one thing I do know is that if I truly love God and honour Him, I should honour and show love to my parents as I do try to for Him. Allah teaches us that disobeying ones parents is like disobeying Him. And the pleasure of your parents should be a constant aspiration of ours. So surely our actions need to reflect that as believers in our Creator. I’m telling myself this more than you!

So to end...let the tears flow as the rain pours as we all need that release but when those tears fade, wipe your coat dry because we must soldier on through each hurdle of life. It will serve to make us wiser, stronger and more loving people. And never forget how important family ties are. They should come first and be nurtured. And I can assure you if you have the support of your parents, your problems will seem like nothing.

I’m gonna work on being dad’s favourite again (rolls eyes) and drop my ‘more than a woman’ attitude so me n mumz are close again. And I’m letting go of those ‘issues’.
Still smiling.